Feeling Better vs. Doing Better; How to Understand the Difference and Become Happier with your Life Today

Clayton Duncan

Feeling Better vs. Doing Better; How to Understand the Difference and Become Happier with your Life Today

A few weeks ago I found myself puzzled. I had just spent hours writing lyrics, nearly finishing two whole songs in one sitting, yet, I still didn’t have any sense of fulfillment. My conscious was telling me, “You haven’t done anything yet. You still have to record this. You still have to get this mixed and mastered. You need artwork, a marketing strategy, a marketing budget etc.” Instead of feeling accomplished, I felt frustrated. It was then that I flashbacked to when I first found songwriting as a passion. In the past, the idea of writing two songs in one day, even just one, would feel like successfully completing a marathon. I used to enjoy every step of the process; the preparation (writing), the execution (recording), and ultimately the reward of knowing that I challenged myself with a task and saw it through to the end.

Considering these past experiences, I started to think, “So, what’s so different now? Why don’t I feel as good as I did before?” I came to the realization that the ONLY thing that had changed was my mindset, and how I felt about the work I was doing. After this moment of reflection, I had somewhat of an epitome! It dawned on me, throughout my life I’ve been conditioned to think that we should only feel better about ourselves when we feel that we’re “doing better” in life. The flaw in this way of thinking is that we’ve all been so conditioned to believe in media outlets and other external influences, our own definitions of success are usually formed based off of the standards of society and popular culture. I realized at that moment, most of us do not truly aspire to “do better” in life, but moreso to just feel better about ourselves. I began to gain the understanding that if I could change what makes me feel good about myself, I could change my outlook on my work and on my life as a whole!

From that point on, I convinced myself that I would enjoy every step of my creative process and fall in love with it all over again. I began using my inner voice to frequently tell myself to be happy with my life, to appreciate my talent and all the opportunities I’ll have to share it with the world. Ever since I made that conscious decision, coupled with consistent, conscious effort, I’ve been happier and more confident in myself and the path that lies ahead.

I’m just as confident that you can feel the same way, although many of you may read this article and feel inspired today, then fall back into that pit of doubt and low self-esteem tomorrow. I’ve done the same exact thing in the past, reading a book or listening to a motivational video feeling like I can take over the world, just to start questioning myself again before I knew it. My best advice to keep that same energy? Constantly reaffirm what you want to believe about yourself and what goals you wish to achieve. I know you’ve read and heard a million times that you should write these things down, and it may seem silly (it always was to me), but it really does work. For example, if you want to improve your confidence, express things such as, “I am confident. I am attractive. I am charming. I am happy with myself. I can do anything.” Again, it may seem foolish to do, especially if you don’t believe it right now, but as we discovered earlier, our influences truly shape our reality. Instead of just accepting what society tells you, that you need to earn this much or have this many views to feel confident, start telling yourself that you are confident and that is what you will become. Write your affirmations on a piece of paper, in your phone, or wherever, and recite these things to yourself at least 3 times a day. In all, this may be 3 minutes total out of the whole 24 hours you have each day to improve your state of mind and feel better about your life. If you have more than 3 minutes, include reading books on positive thinking and the law of attraction. Not into reading books? I personally am not the biggest reader myself, but there are audiobooks and of course, Youtube! Trust me, time spent on shaping your thought process and belief in self is all well worth it.

If you practice these activities daily, you’ll see the biggest misconception we’ve been taught is that happiness is to be earned, or achieved! Although happiness does take effort and persistence, it is simply just a state of mind. It is not something that can be quantified in dollars or likes, and is certainly not something that is only exclusive to the rich and famous! Do not believe any longer that happiness is a destination! Your happiness can start today, right now.


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Twitter: @ClaytWorld



Feeling Better vs. Doing Better; How to Understand the Difference and Become Happier with your Life Today